FAQ - Submit a question to the team!

We at Eatbabies.com receive a lot of questions, and to be completely honest with our loyal fans we are really sick and tired of answering the same questions over and over.  Therefore, we have decided to take the most frequently asked questions, and answer them here in hopes that new, and different questions will be asked.

All questions below are answered to the best ability of the Eatbabies.com webmasters. Should one of our fans believe a question is incorrectly or improperly answered, they are wrong.

Who makes up the Eatbabies.com staff?

The Eatbabies.com staff is comprised of some college guys, and a chicken.

You may be asking yourself, "... a chicken?". The answer is simple. The chicken was very pleased with the idea that babies could be used to replace chicken in any given meal. The chicken has given us many delectable recipes such as "Baby Parmesan", and "Baby Cordon Bleu".

Where did you get the idea for such an amazing site?

One late night in October, the Eatbabies.com team (then known as just "the guys, and a chicken") decided to look up the nastiest .com websites on the internet. When "Eatbabies.com" was typed, its status was listed as "Available", and so Eatbabies.com is born.

What is the appropriate number of babies to cook for a four person family?

This is a very difficult question to answer. It depends on whether or not you are using your own babies. If so, the family size decreases.

Given: 4 person family consisting of 2 adults, 1 child, and 1 baby.

The actual family would then consist of a family of 3, which could be fed by the one baby.

If you are buying your own babies (or snatching them perhaps) then your family could easily be fed by 2 plump babies. Recipes for serving your family can be found here.

WHAT KIND OF A WEBSITE ARE YOU RUNNING?

We are currently running a website specializing in the preparation, cooking, and eating of babies for those who wish to enjoy high quality foods.

Thank you for asking.

What the hell?

Honestly? I don't know.

Whose idea was this?

We blame the chicken.

Could a baby ever eat another baby?

An interesting question. The chicken posed the idea of replacing all "cockfights" (which he believes are cruel and inhumane) with "babyfights" where two babies would be placed in a cage, and would not be removed until one had eaten the other.

We thought that placing two babies in a cage would not compel them to actually fight with each other, and eat each other. But the chicken assured us that in time (without feeding them) and with a little bit of coercion (cocaine), a baby would do just about anything.

How long ago did your site start?

October 14, 2002 to be exact. Our record keeper (the chicken) has assured us.

How can I get a kick ass eatbabies.com email address?

Unfortunately, Eatbabies.com email addresses are restricted to Eatbabies.com staff only. Sorry.

Do you really eat human babies or is the site just a joke?

Do you really not see the disclaimer at the bottom of every single page on Eatbabies.com???

Yes. It is a joke website. And no, we don't eat human babies (although, I can't speak for the chicken).

You all are sick and nasty, why don't you get a hobby and grow up?

*Sigh*...

We do have a hobby. It's called Eatbabies.com. And as for growing up, we are all 7'5" and 250 pounds of pure muscle. If you have any other concerns, please feel free to email YouCantBeatUsUp@eatbabies.com.

My family is coming over for a cook out and I really need to know, what wine goes best with barbeque baby.  I just want everything to be perfect.

This is a very good question. While we prefer our own style of wine (home brewed from the finest baby) we understand that this may not be an available option in such short notice. Since we do not drink anything but the blood of babies, we have posted a poll in the polls section to find out what the best wine is. You can find it here.