Baby Surprise Tarts:

Ingredients:

Three medium sized male babies

One quart of fresh elephant semen

Thirty large tart cups

Instructions: If babies still have skin, remove skin with a potato peeler. After peeling the babies, place the skin to one side for later use. Using a large, somewhat dull blade, dismember the babies quickly, setting aside the genetalia, fingers, and toes. Cut these into small cubes and place in the bottom of the tart cups for a pleasant surprise. Remove bones from babies and feed to raccoons, if any are at hand. If not, dispose of in Glad bags. Heat the semen in a large copper pot, and scald the babies. When the babies dissolve, and the liquid in the pot looks sufficiently un-baby-like, pour the jellified mass into the tart cups. Enjoy!

Serves one large police force.

Tried, Tested, and True- Courtesy of Katie Cartmell